okay. so the engagement pictures and story will soon come, but i feel like i need a little wedding-planning vent.
already...?
so i've gotten mixed reactions about the engagement. well, no. i take that back. -every- person has been really excited and asked to see the ring and tells me how pretty it is and how sweet and perfect the proposal was (which is allll true.) they ask me how long we've been together (which is complicated because it's somewhere between a very "official" 1.5 years to a less official 2... to an actual 10.5). but anyhow. then the question comes.
"well, i know it's early, but have you set a date?"
to which i reply "august 8th" and then wait for the response:
"you -really- think you're going to plan a wedding in 3 months? are you crazy?!"
"are you pregnant? i mean... there's nothing WRONG with that... but... ARE YOU?"
"wooooow. that's... ...fast."
"oooh. okay. wait. you mean this year?"
etc.
i didn't think much of it when we finally decided on the day. it's the simplest way. i feel like that date BEST accomplishes our purpose. it's convenient... it's not during school... and frankly. we've been talking about getting married for about 2 years now... and i'm just tired of talking about it. i want to BE married to Charlie Loup. i want to be his wife and wake up with him next to me. i want to come home to him in the evenings and fall asleep with him on the couch and then go to bed with him. i want to do our grocery shopping with him. i want to know him the way you can ONLY know someone when you live with them. i -need- more time with him. i just... can't get enough.
why should i have to justify all of this?
why should there be this stigma that the only reason you'd have a quick engagement is because you're pregnant? WHY have weddings turned into this BIG production where you try to impress you guests with how elaborate they are...? why is it okay that wedding planning books TEACH you how to become a bridezilla?
why can't we go back to the original intention? why can't we go back to the VOWS and the true heart of the ceremony? it's to cause two to become one. it's to surround yourself with those people most important to you. it's... ugh.
why is this becoming about $100/head meals and whether or not i can afford to give every guest an amazing present and if it's tacky or not to reuse the ceremony chairs for the reception chairs...? WHY?
PLEASE help me stay accountable to my ideals. i want it to be simple... stripped down to the basics. i want this to be a fun process... one that truly reflects charlie and my relationship... and one that will only bring us closer together.
Bringing Out the Dead (Film Review)
1 day ago
from someone who just got married last summer...
ReplyDeletesmile and nod when people give advice. and then do whatever you want. i found that i'm a pleaser, and will smile and say i love it even though it's horrible. but, i told my mom exactly what i wanted for our wedding, and she became the "bad person" for me. and in the end, we had the wedding that was the perfect fit of us...a little weird, a little fun, a just a little traditional.
some people are probably "shocked" about the 3 months until the wedding just because there's so much to do in such a seemingly short period of time. but, luckily you have a lot of people around you who would love to help...and that makes 10000% difference.
and if you find yourself pregnant, say, oh, a month after the wedding or so (because that CERTAINLY wasn't john and i), then it's okay to feel guarded, get flustered by weird looks, and watch people mentally counting how long you've been married. there's nothing you can do about it but smile and say "not that it matters, but it happened after we were married".
best of luck! we're really, really excited for you both!! if you need anything, let us know!
Hey lady! Wedding planning...sheesh...people are so dramatic! Why do they even care when or how?! It's YOUR day lady! :) (This coming from someone who wants to be engaged for only a few months!)
ReplyDeleteAmanda is getting married May 15..so they have awhile yet.
and that's why i wore extensions. haha :)
ReplyDeletematt wanted to get married 6 weeks after we got engaged. it just wouldn't work with our schedules, but there is NOTHING wrong with 3 months!!! and if people REALLY know you and your relationship they should know you aren't knocked up!! some people...
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