lessons learned (part 5)

Sometimes, I feel like a slug.

Other times, you bite into your beautiful fresh strawberry, and uncover a slug.

Yum.

what am i to do?

I taught sunday school yesterday to the 4-5 year olds. they were precious. they listened well. they could re-tell the story about abraham and sarah moving to a foreign land and God blessing them for listening to him.

we played with play-dough. we sang 'joshua fought the battle of jericho' and too many verses of "Jesus loves me". we played toss the beach ball. we colored our very own puzzles.

and then there was snack time. goldfish.

and i got glutened. even though the lady helping me actually served the goldfish.

but 5 year old hands touch everything and go everywhere.

 what's a girl to do?

quotes of the day

"I think I have a slight case of rabies. They go gradually insane, you know."

"The queen of England has a wooden leg, doesn't she?"

yeah.

Today a patient offered me her bra.
I believe it went "I've got a bra I think you could use dah'lin"

Louisiana Heart Gallery (PCP, W and E Feliciana edition)

May is national foster care awareness month. 

There are 5000 children in foster care in Louisiana alone. 327 of them are available for adoption. The children in this picture are those who are waiting to be adopted in Pointe Coupee, West and East Feliciana Parishes. I wanted to remember the motherless on a day like Mother's day, and remind everyone that being a mother comes in many forms. God commanded us to care for the widows and orphans!

Pastor Timmy had me in a high traffic area on Sunday, but most people just looked without asking questions. One woman seemed very interested, but another woman who was adopted and had adopted two babies tried to talk her out of foster care! She said it's too hard and you get too attached.

One man thanked me for having a table set up--he was also adopted.

And one little boy kept staring at a picture on the table. He came back to the table over and over again. Finally, he said "he was my best friend last year--how did you get a picture of him?" I explained what the table was, and he then proceeded to try to convince his parents to adopt him :) It was very sweet.

Other than that, most people that came by frowned and said it was too hard to look at. 

I'm not sure what reaction I was expecting, but Sunday wasn't it?

I think I'll try to set up at least next week so maybe people will get curious enough to ask about it. I know awareness is one of the biggest points and that (obviously) not everyone is called to foster or adopt. 

I guess it's hard when you are really passionate about something and people... don't care. Charlie feels that way about vegetables. My dad feels that way about Theology. I know missionaries feel that way about missions. Some stay-at-home moms feel that way about staying home just like some working moms feel that way about careers. It's just hard. And I guess Charlie and I aren't quite to the point that we can actually foster or adopt (although we are getting closer). 

The faces break my heart. I started crying when I started opening the files and seeing their faces. So I understand when people say it's too hard to look at. I guess it's easier to ignore when you can't see their faces and their smiles and realize that they were best friends with your children. 

I don't know what I'm trying to say. I just needed to say something.

The continuum of motherhood

To those who gave birth this year to their first child—we celebrate with you

To those who lost a child this year – we mourn with you

To those who are in the trenches with little ones every day and wear the badge of food stains – we appreciate you

To those who experienced loss through miscarriage, failed adoptions, or running away—we mourn with you

To those who walk the hard path of infertility, fraught with pokes, prods, tears, and disappointment – we walk with you. Forgive us when we say foolish things. We don’t mean to make this harder than it is.

To those who are foster moms, mentor moms, and spiritual moms – we need you

To those who have warm and close relationships with your children – we celebrate with you

To those who have disappointment, heart ache, and distance with your children – we sit with you

To those who lost their mothers this year – we grieve with you

To those who experienced abuse at the hands of your own mother – we acknowledge your experience

To those who lived through driving tests, medical tests, and the overall testing of motherhood – we are better for having you in our midst

To those who have aborted children – we remember them and you on this day

To those who are single and long to be married and mothering your own children – we mourn that life has not turned out the way you longed for it to be

To those who step-parent – we walk with you on these complex paths

To those who envisioned lavishing love on grandchildren -yet that dream is not to be, we grieve with you

To those who will have emptier nests in the upcoming year – we grieve and rejoice with you

To those who placed children up for adoption — we commend you for your selflessness and remember how you hold that child in your heart

And to those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising –we anticipate with you

This Mother’s Day, we walk with you. Mothering is not for the faint of heart and we have real warriors in our midst. We remember you.

from http://www.messymiddle.com/2012/05/10/an-open-letter-to-pastors-a-non-mom-speaks-about-mothers-day/

This is beautiful. Happy Mothers Day to all the women out there.

lessons learned (part 4)

i was mowing the yard the other day and hit a rather large hole in the ground (our lot is -really- uneven, i've learned after mowing it the last month or so). anyhow, i got the lawnmower stuck in said hole. ooops. i tried moving forward and backward. no luck.

i had to call charlie.

charlie came to the rescue with his employee leonardo (who is about 13). and the best 13 year old there ever was. charlie pushed me out of the hole with leonardo looking on. after i was out, leonardo said, "don't worry! i don't think i would have seen that hole either!"

be kind. be understanding. be humble.

lessons learned (part 3)

i went to the fair with nic, crystal, fox, charlie, and arisa on saturday night. we were watching fox and risa on the Ferris wheel when an -extremely- drunk woman with two small boys came stumbling over. she was stumbling around with her drink and slurring at the boys, "do yall want to ride that? -i- don't want to ride that. WHO WANTS TO RIDE WITH THEM? someone? anyone? you can have freeeee tickets to ride with them. you girls?" finally (after a little prompt from crystal), i said i would take them on the ferris wheel. cutest little boys ever.

we hopped on and i started talking to them. brothers. one 3, one 2. they were calling the woman "denise" so i assumed it was their dad's girlfriend or something? we waved at denise each time we went around. we looked at the fingernail moon. we looked at the lights. we looked at the other rides. the younger one flipped backwards in his seat to look behind us (don't worry. i had a death grip on him.) i asked him to put his back against the seat and he snapped back at me (i think in Spanish)... but i got the gist of what he was saying. "nuh-uh. i do what i want." so then i had to keep my death grip on him for the rest of the ride. even when he kicked off one of his CUTE little cowboy boots. and then i had to grip him and his shoes.

when we got off i told denise how precious they were and started to put jamie's shoes back on. she was getting frustrated that it took so long and said, "put your damn shoes.. i mean come on. let's get your shoes back on." she told me she's not their mom or step-mom or anything--just their neighbor. thank God, she added.

i was (of course) imagining having kids like that as foster kids. and how when they're 2 they've already learned habits and can talk back and want to do things their way (maybe that's all 2 year olds?) i was imagining how difficult it would be to raise kids whose parents have always let them do what they want (okay i was making a lot of assumptions. but people. what kind of parent leaves their small children at a fair with an INCREDIBLY drunk woman?)

lesson learned? don't leave your small children at a fair with an incredibly drunk woman.
also? i thought about kidnapping them, but then thought legally keeping kids is probably the way to go.

lessons learned (part 2)

i can't take credit for this lesson. a lady from church shared it at our women's night last friday.

she said she was meditating on "deep calling to deep" and wondering what that means and what that looks like with our walk with God. going deeper with God can seem really scary and really risky. but then she said God gave her a vision.

she saw all the storms and tornadoes we have been having in the south lately, and she saw a family in their house. and if you're in a storm or you know a storm is coming, you don't go up to your bedroom on the second floor to try to hold everything down and make sure all of your stuff is okay. No. You go into the basement--you go into the deepest part of your house where you know you and your family will be safe. then she saw the family in the basement and they were crowded around a radio--carefully listening for the report about the storm. that's where they get their information on what's -really- going on outside. while they're safe in the deep place.

that picture is so powerful to me. hearing God while i'm safe in the deep place while the storm is going on around me outside. listening carefully while things are most chaotic. resting when things seem most unsure.

lessons learned (part 1)

We have a patient. We'll call her Ms F. sometimes she thinks she's a man. sometimes she's a woman. she has multiple mental health issues going on. she flips from smiling and loving you to cursing you out and telling you to go away in seconds. yeah. she also claims to be married to one of our male patients. he goes along with it. i think mostly because it's easiest that way. some staff members were talking to her and asked her about kissing another patient. she got really angry and yelled "HE'S JUST MY FRIEND! EVERYONE LOVES ME BECAUSE I'M SUCH A PLEASANT PERSON!" i almost had to leave the room after that. lesson learned? be pleasant and everyone will love you :)