Hello

Wow it's been a while.

I've been thinking it'd be good to start blogging again. I have alllll the emotions and it would probably be good to process them and get them out in a healthy outlet.

AJ is almost a year old! It has gone so quickly. Well, the days have (sometimes) been long, but the year has flown.

I'm working 2-3 days/week at work. Just starting to try to add 4-8 hours every other week. It will help me keep up with one of my units that I don't really get to spend much time on. My job keeps me so busy--so my 10 hour days FLY by. I've really enjoyed working. After so much wondering about what I'd want to do/need to do once AJ came, I feel so sure that God provided the exact situation I needed. Even the population I'm working with. God is really faithful.

AJ is the most delightful baby/person/little girl that ever lived. I literally just stare at her while she plays sometimes. She's so funny! The way she studies things and tries to figure it out. Watching her try to stack things on top of each other and being genuinely interested in why sometimes it balances and sometimes it doesn't! The way she's started to randomly lay down on the floor or lay her head down on her lovie while she's standing by the ottoman. haha Trying to shove pieces of fruit in her mouth using her whole hand. Or trying to pat her mouth to make "ah-ah-ah-ah" sounds but how she uses the back of her hand and just wiggles her fingers. I can't describe it right, but it's completely ridiculous. Or how she snuggles up with me at night and sometimes randomly on the couch.

There is NOTHING in all the world like having a daughter. It's incredible. I am SO PROUD of her over the littlest things. (^see paragraph above :))

In December, I really thought I had 100% recovered from all the perinatal issues. I haven't. Generally now, they're just a bother. Like allergies or something. It's annoying, but doesn't really interfere with ADLs or drastically impact my quality of life.

I really believe our bodies/minds/guts are so much more connected than we understand. I'm reading a couple of books about the nutrient/mind connection. They think that one day we will literally be able to treat mental illnesses with nutrients rather than medications. I think we're a looooong way off from that, but wouldn't that be something? I want to understand it more. I really believe the issues I have had are connected with nutrition/hormones/imbalances.

On the radio yesterday, they were talking about depression. Someone called in and said that every person on earth should feel dismayed at the state things are in. I disagree with that (I think if you can't see anything good, you probably are clinically depressed), but it is true that there are a lot of hard things marbled into the good. AJ is the best thing that's ever happened to me! But it is marbled with hard things.